singgah jap..

lamenyer tak menyinggah kat sini..
wonder if there anyone yg still lagi menjenguk kat page ni once in awhile.
hehe.
well, lotsa things going on.
tapi everytime bukak blogger ni, mesti rase cam malas gile nak update.
this is jez a random entry anyway, coz dah sangap gile tak tau nak watpe..

i am in hungry mode.
tapi malas nak masak.
ape lagi nak kuar lunch.
coz being alone kat rumah, turn me into such a lazy pig.
bukan ape, kalo dah sorang kat umah, nak masak kang, kene basuh periuk kuali.
masak nasik + lauk = lotsa dishes, jez untuk diri sdiri, sgt tak berbaloi k.
end up makan cereal ngan roti for lunch.
umm, janji perut kenyang erk.

tadi on the fon with sya.
rase sangat bersalah tak attend wedding die last weekn.
well, banyak masalah sgt kat rumah ni, so am decided not to go.
my honda dah 3 weeks kat workshop, dapat penyakit yg tak sembuh2..
bosan aku dok berabis duit kat kete buruk tuh.
dah laa tgh takde duit, tak abis2 nysahkan org.. hummm..
well..well..
sangat sangap n keboringan..
am not working for 3 months now.
nak carik keje lain, for sure agak susah nak dapat.
of coz laa, dah 7 months pregger, sape laa nak amik keje.
paling cepat aku leh keje pun bulan 10 nanti.
another 3 months.
well, patutke aku start carik keje skarang.
lagipun bulan lapan nanti baru nak grad.
i think bulan puase kot baru start carik keje.
hopefully di bulan yang mulia nanti rezeki aku murah sikit.
eceh.

honestly, i am psychologically not stable n very insecure.
coz i miss aiman alot (die kat kg for 2 weeks), i am broke,
jobless, heavily pregnant and lonely.
i'm trying to figure out everyday how to keep myself insane.
but i am too lazy to do anything.
masalah betul laa pompuan ni.
haa, one more thing.
i'm having a digestional diabetes, hum, thanx to my dad for giving me the diabetes gene on me.
well, another reason for my depression.
guess what, am starting to lose weight.
and have low blood pressure.
thank goodness..

alot of stressful things happened in my life since 2009 started.
but, i think i am strong enough, tho sometime i feel like giving up my life.
honestly, bersabar is the only words i can hold on to right now.
coz i know, mungkin banyak sangat dosa aku ngan Tuhan sebelum ni, so Dia nak uji aku, aku ni manusia yg jenis sedar diri ke tak.
tapi aku tau, segala susah payah and kesengsaraan aku ni, is really worth every second of it.
Sebab aku tau, Tuhan beri ujian sebab nak suh aku sedar.
kalo aku cukup sabar, keep my faith on, who knows dosa2 aku pun berkurang.
InsyaAllah.
but, hopefully Tuhan kasik jugak kebahagian untuk aku suatu hari nanti sooner or later.
sape tanak idup senang kan?
walaupun camni, aku tetap bersyukur, aku tak kebuluran. aku ade rumah, ade aiman, ade hunky
and ade everything yg aku perlukan untuk survive.
Terima kasih Tuhan untuk segala-galanya.

p/s: there're a few ladies i miss alot. Amar, Wan Rose, Sya and other babes, if u read this, buzz me k. i miss u guys.